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690124 - Letter to Himavati written from Los Angeles
January 24, 1969
My Dear Himavati,
Please accept my blessings. I am in due receipt of your letter of January 16, 1969, and I thank you very much for this. The deity clothing that you have sent are all very beautiful, and everything is fitting just rightly. Regarding your thoughts of separating from your husband, I do not think this is a very good plan. You should always live with your husband and help him with his personal comforts, and he will look after your all necessities of life. There is no question of separation. By mutual agreement and advancement of Krishna Consciousness you can stop sex life, but there is no question of separation. Separation is artificial. As Hamsaduta advances in Krishna Consciousness then by his company you will also profit. So the husband and wife are mutually beneficial. This idea of separation was developed also in Govinda Dasi, but I have sent her back to her husband, and she is now following my instructions. There is no question of separation between husband and wife until the time when the husband takes sannyasa. At that time the wife cannot remain with the husband. Even in vanaprastha stage, or retired life, the wife remains with the husband, but without any sex relations.
Regarding your keeping private deities, if you will have time it is all right, but the same energy can be utilized in the temple for decorating, dressing, cleaning, cooking. Actually, every day the dress should be changed with new ornaments, clothes, flower garlands. So we can increase even in one place the activities of deity worship. If you are having free time, I can give you a very grand list of activities for deity worship which will keep you occupied for twenty four hours each day.
Regarding your question about the husband becoming the Spiritual Master of the wife, anyone who can give instructing in spiritual life is treated as Spiritual Master. There are two kinds of Spiritual Master, initiator and instructor. So the husband can help the wife as instructor.
So far as the money which is owed to New York temple, I never suggested that you should send deity clothing for payment. But if Montreal owes $500 to New York then it must be payed, if not at a time, then gradually. That is your mutual account. If you actually owe some money to New York then you must try to pay it. If you are unable to pay, then I shall ask Brahmananda to square up the account, or if need be, I shall pay it from my book fund for you. So don't worry about it. There should be no misunderstanding on this point. It is departmental management only. The government has so many departments. One department pays another so there is no question of misunderstanding because you are all working for Krishna. In any case, the $500, if Montreal temple is unable to pay, then I shall ask Brahmananda to square it up, or if need be, I shall pay it.
Regarding your questions about the examinations to be given, the girls will also be able to take these. In Krishna Consciousness there is no distinction between girls and boys. The girls also may become preachers if they are able.
Once again I thank you for the nice deity clothings and for your letter. I hope this will meet you in good health.
Your ever well-wisher,
A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami