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760524 - Conversation - Honolulu

His Divine Grace
A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada

760524R1-HONOLULU - May 24, 1976 -13:10 Minutes

Devotee: She has come to an impasse in her family life. She doesn't know what to do. So the situation, I think you are familiar with, that Gaurasundara has been living with this other girl for three years, and Govinda dāsī is under the impression that you've sanctioned that Gaurasundara can have two wives.

Prabhupāda: He . . . she can imagine anything. What can I do?

Govinda dāsī: Well, he told me that you sanctioned it.

Devotee: I said that . . .

Govinda dāsī: Gaurasundara will come back.

Devotee: . . . that you were sympathetic that these young girls had no husbands, but . . .

Prabhupāda: We have nothing to do with it.

Govinda dāsī: The girl is agreeable to going, to . . . she doesn't care, and I just want Gaurasundara to come back.

Prabhupāda: (indistinct) . . . to this family. Gaurasundara is out of, also. These things will change our . . . (indistinct) . . . it is my suggestion that so many girls are without husband, if a husband can maintain three dozen wives I have no objection.

Govinda dāsī: He doesn't maintain me.

Prabhupāda: Huh? Then what can I do?

Govinda dāsī: Yes.

Prabhupāda: That is your affair. But I say if a person is able to maintain three dozen wives, then I have no objection. Now, if he does not maintain you, then what can I do? That is your situation.

Devotee: I think I have told her the same thing.

Prabhupāda: Neither it is my business to deal with family life. No more. That is my general opinion. But if they can maintain more than one wife . . . it is simply a question of maintaining. But if one is not maintaining, what can I do? Now we shall not deal with family affairs anymore. We give chance to the gṛhastha to develop Kṛṣṇa consciousness, but we cannot tax our brain over that. That is not . . . generally gṛhastha should live apart from temple. Gṛhastha should not live in the temple. If there is . . . (indistinct) . . . becoming a problem. Every gṛhastha must take care of wife, children, maintenance. But how you can do that, temple-living? Temple is meant for the renounced, for the brahmacārīs, who have no, I mean to say, embarrassment, that "I have to take care of my wife, I have to take care of children, I have to do this, I have to do that." As soon as one becomes gṛhastha, he has got his own . . . (indistinct) . . . so everyone has got his passion how to maintain their . . . (indistinct) . . . now how the temple can do it, handle this? Better avoid. This is a . . . (indistinct) . . . small temple . . . (indistinct) . . . gṛhastha. Temple is meant for person who is exclusively interested for Kṛṣṇa culture. We are advising to stop sex, and gṛhastha life is sex life. So how we can (laughs) tax our brain? The gṛhastha life is sex life, straightforward sex life. So we are advising "No sex."

Devotee: A constant worry in your . . . (indistinct) . . . Śrīla Prabhupāda.

Prabhupāda: Huh?

Devotee: That must be worry in your . . . (indistinct)

Prabhupāda: That's a fact. Don't worry. So about this sex āśrama, it is not possible to tax our brain. But according to the Vedic system, if a man marries more than one wife, there is no . . . how it is possible in this condition? We are in Western country . . . (indistinct) . . . but we are not Krsna, we can't maintain more than one wife.

Devotee: They cannot live in the temple separately in such a circum . . .

Prabhupāda: Huh?

Devotee: If they want to do so, they can't live in the temple separately?

Prabhupāda: No, no. In the temple even living with one wife it is not possible. We have to restrict them. No wives live in the temple in India. Family . . . (indistinct) . . . in certain circumstance, in the temple they live separately, but not in the temple building. That is strictly prohibited. It is becoming a great problem, because there are girls, there are boys, so the temple is becoming a lovemaking center. Even one grhastha . . . (indistinct) . . . he has got his wife, he is implicated with another woman. Even if one is gṛhastha. The girl is after another husband. This is the practice now in the Western countries. Even they are allowed to live as gṛhastha, then it will still create havoc. It will be very problematic. I thought, "Let them be married." So their business is different—sense enjoyment. Sometimes here, sometimes there, sometimes where? Sometimes take sannyāsa, then again implicated with another woman. These things are going on. It is . . . (indistinct) . . . they cannot take care of the children, and not sending to school. Hmm? Every woman is taking care of her child. Why not woman taking care of ten children? Then the mothers will be free to do some help to the organization. Early in the morning they are coming. Everyone is anxious to take care of their children. Even they marry, there is problem, children and, what is it called, adultery. Eh?

Devotee: Mixing with another man's wife.

Prabhupāda: Yes. And if they do not marry, the man is hunting after woman, and woman is hunting after man. So both ways there is trouble. If they marry, really, then there are children. Then the problem is you have to take care of the children.

Devotee: And they don't even take care of the children.

Prabhupāda: This is great problem. The temple is meant for advancement in Kṛṣṇa consciousness. Therefore those who are carefree of family life can live any way; there is no question of much anxiety for living and eating—that is secondary. Then they can live in temple. One who wants to live comfortably, requiring sex, children—that is a big problem for the temple.

Devotee: Apparently.

Prabhupāda: These things disturb Tamāla Kṛṣṇa. Therefore he wanted to make some stricture. But they become very much upset. I don't want to upset; let them live. But they must always remember the temple is meant for only advancing Kṛṣṇa consciousness. We should not bring other problems. This household life is material problems, sex problems. So how the temple can take responsibility for these problems? Then Kṛṣṇa consciousness will be slack. So? That's all right? So don't . . .

Govinda dāsī: Śrīla Prabhupāda, I wanted to show you these pictures also. Siddha-svarūpa gave them to me. They are from . . . they are deities that they made in the Philippines, very inexpensively, by their sculptors there, and they are made out of wood. And they are copies. I just thought you would be interested.

Devotee: How big are those deities? You know? How big are those deities?

Govinda dāsī: They are twenty-seven inches high, and they only cost fifteen dollars each to make, and they are made out of carved wood. The anatomy is not very nice—I mean it could be better—but that is because I think they did not have anything to copy. But the Phili . . . they were very, very cheap for wood. Very cheap for that much craftsmanship. They are poor there. But Sudāmā Vipra Mahārāja . . .

Prabhupāda: He sent? The picture is sent by him?

Govinda dāsī: No. Siddha-svarūpa just gave it to me as I was coming in. He showed it to me. And apparently it was sent to Siddha-svarūpa by Sudāmā, and I don't . . .

Prabhupada: . . . (indistinct) (break)

Devotee: This is concerning that BBT business in Vṛndāvana . . . in India. Gopal . . . (break) (end)