670714 - Letter to Sripad Narayana Maharaja written from Stinson Beach
July 14, 1967
"Sri Sri Guru Gauranga Jayatho"
A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami
c/o P.M. Stinson Beach
Sri Sri Vaisnava Carana Dandavat Purvikiyam
I am offering my dandavat pranaamas to the Vaisnavas' lotus feet and then I am writing.
Sripad Narayana Maharaja,
I am very happy to receive a letter in your own handwriting dated the 8th of July. I have received all of your letters and I have replied to each. I hope you have received them. I am worried that Vinoda Kumara still has not received his passport and "P" form, If he still hasn't received the passport, deposit the rest of the money in the Vrndavana Bank. It is very possible that I will return to Vrndavana in the upcoming August. After, if Krsna keeps me alive, I will come back here. I had planned to preach so much here. But all the work is postponed due to my health deteriorating. Certainly the disciples are doing their best but they need to learn a lot. It is all possible if Krsna bestows His mercy.
At present I am anxious to return to Vrndavana. Here I stay in a palatial building. There are always four of them ready to serve me, and there is no want of prasada, lodging or any care. However, I still feel that my broken kutira without any opulence, bathing in the Yamuna, darsana of the temples, and the ripped cotton quilt of the Gaudiya Vaisnavas are so very sweet. Being so far from Vrndavana I am realizing its mahatmya (greatness). Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu said, "As Krsna is to be worshipped so is Vrndavana." Now I am somewhat realizing that. As Krsna is sweet, Vrindavana is similarly sweet. You bless me so that I can return to Vrndavana. I am old now. I am not afraid to die, but if my life air passes away in the lotus dust of the Vaisnavas in Vrndavana then that would be very blissful. As soon as I am well I want to return to Vrndavana. Then, if I feel better I will return here and preach. The foundation of preaching has become good here. In the future, even if I do not come, any sincere Vaisnava can come and do hari-kirtana here.
Among the three branches I am willing to install Sri Sri Radha Krsna in Montreal (Canada). The Deities will arrive there at the end of this month. I shall then go to Montreal. And if I am alive I shall reach Delhi, directly via London and Moscow. I shall let you know on time.
In Delhi there are many books in the almirah. If you can send those, it would be good. Anyway I shall write you later about this.
I have replied to the United Shipping Corporation accordingly-no worry. I hope you are well. Write to me about Vinoda Kumara. You wanted to know about my health. "As in a broken house with only fireflies for light, as long as it lasts, is good." I was not supposed to survive the stroke that attacked me, but Krsna somehow kept me alive. With the mercy of Srila Prabhupada and his Thakura Krsna's desire, I am still alive. You should know that this is a wonder. Every moment the signs of my health change. Only Krsna's mercy is keeping me alive. Gradually life is coming in my dead body and there are some improvements. That is why I am writing to you in my own handwriting. You are a sincere Vaisnava. Krsna will certainly listen to you. You pray to Krsna that before dying I will be able to have darsana once more of Vrndavana.
Sri Bhaktivedanta Swami
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